i strive to be a better person.

along the way, i fail.
at almost everything i do, i fail.
it throws me into this empty corner, thinking through what i have done.
yeap.
like what we see on the tv screens when primary going school kids does something teachers consider 'naughty', they are then sent to one corner of the classroom where they sit to ponder on what they have done. if i'm not mistaken, they called this the corner of shame?
but hey. i do believe it works. neheh.

humans are not perfect.
we, in fact, will never be.
we can be considered as 'good' or 'expert' at something, but we can never be perfect.
'perfect' is a more like a self-proclaimed status.
'perfect' means there is no room for improvement.
'perfect' means you are at the ultimate peak of whatever you claim to be 'perfect' at.
'perfect' means you're an ass.
one brainless one indeed.

things in life are ever-changing.
you change to adjust to the current situation.
you can't predict what happens next. you can guess, but you won't know for sure, until it happens.
after drastic changes being made, you stop, realising how far you are from who you were, you start wondering...
what have you missed.
missed in the sense where you 'left' the past behind.
thinking back,
how much you could've done,
what you should've done,
how it would change the current situation if you had done that.
regrets.
regrets with actions you could've taken.
regrets with actions you have done.

but then again, the past belongs where it belongs, the past.
there is no such thing as time travelling.
there isn't a point regretting about the past either.
we live our lives for the present.
the past is a remembrance on how we should decide on the present given situations,
where we hope, we would not regret this decision, like the past decisions made.

the past will definitely haunt us as we live on,
the past holds us down, keeping us 'grounded',
the past reminds us, that we are not perfect,
the past guides us to the future,
the past, is the past.

as much as i will fail,
i will learn to stand up on my own two feet,
and brave the world once again.
over, and over, and over, and over again.